A while ago, I saw a tweet that went something like, “My kids had better be funny. I can’t spend the rest of life at home with them if they are boring.”
When I saw the tweet, I smiled. I smiled because, with kids, there is never a dull moment. They arrive as newborns who can barely change position on the bed. The day they are even able to lift their heads on their own or shift an inch, it is a wow moment. When they are toddlers, the excitement comes from their innocence, simplicity and basically how they view the world. So you don’t need kids to be funny to make them exciting. The simple things they do in itself are funny because they are just so unexpected.
I don’t remember the handle of the person who shared the tweet or anything close to it. All the same, thanks to the person. Thanks, because it gave me an idea to keep a record of the interesting moments we have with our toddlers at home. Today, I will share with you the very simple things Asempa has done/said since I decided to make note of them. I hope to share this for each of my kids every now and then.
Welcome to Never a Dull Moment I, featuring Asempa!
Motherhood, a glimpse of what man does to God. Nowadays, I’m forced to eat pepperless food because we eat with the kids… Yesterday, we ate a meal together. When we were done, I went to dish something extra for myself (all the running around and “Stop it” make mummy extra hungry). I knew they will still come to Mummy even though they were full so I carefully put my pepper at one side. I started eating and yes, they came like kakai. I started off by giving them a spoon of food when they requested.
Until suddenly, my 2 year old insists he must take over the spoon.
Me : No, no. Let me do it. I know the side that has no pepper.
Asempa : Gimmie, Gimmie, spoooon, spoon!
We go back and forth for a while as I try to explain carefully to him.
Daddy : Let him take the spoon and feel the pepper! 😈
Me : 😔🤭😳 (Concerned Mummy, you know)
I now watch as he goes right for the peppered section and puts a large spoonful in his mouth. He chews and chews and then…..
Asempa: “Pepper! Pepper! Daddy, water! Water!!!!” He is almost in tears.
And this, my beloved is what we do when we don’t want to listen to the promptings of God but rather do things our way. These kids minister like this to me each day. They think they know it all…but what do they know?
PS. In this story, I play the part of God 🤓 and my son is humankind. Don’t ask me the part hubby plays 🏃🏽🏃🏽🏃🏽
Me : Paa, have you seen my glasses?
Asempa : Yes!
Me : Where is it?
Asempa : It’s not there😐
Me : You are not my friend
Asempa : I my friend
Me : No, you are not my friend because I don’t like what you are doing.
Asempa : I like it!
Ayemye spit up on Daddy’s shoulder.
Asempa : Ohhh, Baby!
Daddy, sorry okay.
Asempa then turned to Ayemye and raised hand(We had to prevent the beating from landing)
Baby, don’t do that a Daddy!
I was driving and yawned.
Asempa: Oh Mummy, you’re tired?
Me : Yes oh, I’m tired.
Asempa: Mummy, adaa.
Me : I should sleep? Would you and your brother allow me to sleep?
Asempa : No!
He then laughed.
Asempa has learnt a “clean up” song in school! Oh my! Charley. Nowadays, he will mess the hall up as usual and then he naa will say “Clean up” and start cleaning. Is someone singing Hallelujah with me? The only downside is, once he’s declared clean up, Ayemye can’t play with the toys either. 🤭 He’ll snatch them all and pack them up. Sorry, Baby brother, orders from above please 😅Daddy was sitting on a piece of our puzzle play mat during one of these clean up moments.
Asempa : “Daddy, I beg you, clean up”
Yes, even Daddy has to get up so he can pack everything. We mean business here wai.
I was on my phone while he was watching his rhymes. An action song comes on and he starts doing the actions. Then…
Asempa: Mummy, clap your hands
Me : (Still doing my phone business)
Asempa: Mummy, phone down, clap your hands.
Asempa and I went to buy something from a shop. He asked for aburo and nkatiɛ (roasted corn and groundnut) which had been packaged in a bottle. I didn’t want to buy it for him but he insisted. Since I was carrying Ayemye and several other things, I was not in a tantrum-handling mood so I just had to give in. I was obviously annoyed about this and I think he noticed it. We went to another shop and knowing that mum’s mood has changed, he went to the shopkeeper and gave the bottle to him. Unfortunately, the shopkeeper did not understand what he wanted him to do so Asempa still had the unopened bottle when we stepped out of the shop. He looked at my face, realised my mood had still not improved then looks towards the sky and says, “Jesus, come open for me”. I was stunned! I turned to him and asked, you said Jesus should do what. He laughed and repeated it!
Asempa took Daddy’s laptop (which he knows he shouldn’t be taking). Ayemye comes to touch it. Asempa : Herh! Don’t touch it. It’s for Daddy.
When Asempa is asleep, Ayemye wants to wake him up, when Ayemye is asleep, Asempa wants to wake him up 🤦🏽
Asempa : (Attempting to wake Ayemye up)
Me : Asempa, leave him alone! The boy is tired, let him sleep.
Asempa : Mama, let him wake up
That’s it, folks! Hope Asempa put a smile on your face. Which was your favourite? Have an interesting moment with your kids or someone else’s to share? Go ahead in the comments below.